This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
