I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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