Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
So much Jack, so little girl.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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