Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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