She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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