We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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