Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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