Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
