I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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