how can u be prego again
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
