At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
soo... how was my night?
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