so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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