dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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