Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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