Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
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