My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
