I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
