big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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