my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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