READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
