super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize