youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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