...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
