i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
