So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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