who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
