Define "chronic" masturbator.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
