i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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