Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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