Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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