With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
