we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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