today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
