Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
