so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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