Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
