You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
