Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police

  (616): View more from Michigan

  What?!?

  (810): View more from Michigan

  What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police

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  (810): Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police (616): What?!? (810): What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police http://tfl.nu/unre
  Replies (20) Good night (4685) Bad night (869)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .

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  (609): She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . . http://tfl.nu/b8fc
  Replies (6) Good night (797) Bad night (2392)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.

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  (405): You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show. http://tfl.nu/4wfw
  Replies (4) Good night (2411) Bad night (865)
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  (530): View more from California

  He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.

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  (530): He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me. http://tfl.nu/h0f1
  Replies (39) Good night (1162) Bad night (15814)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?

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  (203): I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night? http://tfl.nu/u6ad
  Replies (6) Good night (5321) Bad night (1366)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  nope, you were tallying rejections at the party

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  (313): hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots? (734): nope, you were tallying rejections at the party http://tfl.nu/c1is
  Replies (8) Good night (1134) Bad night (6020)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  i think i left my bra at your place

  (1-901): View more from Tennessee

  It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.

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  (901): i think i left my bra at your place (1-901): It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there. http://tfl.nu/dg7a
  Replies (22) Good night (10866) Bad night (1117)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like

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  (781): I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like http://tfl.nu/tc65
  Replies (6) Good night (3372) Bad night (1000)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.

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  (305): Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin. http://tfl.nu/eiwf
  Replies (12) Good night (1120) Bad night (1428)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?

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  (651): Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend? http://tfl.nu/kwwo
  Replies (5) Good night (1540) Bad night (634)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband

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  (512): ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband http://tfl.nu/p8hd
  Replies (5) Good night (588) Bad night (1904)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?

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  (302): Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk? http://tfl.nu/2gxv
  Replies (5) Good night (618) Bad night (1425)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.

  (636): View more from Missouri

  I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.

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  (636): I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB. (636): I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE. http://tfl.nu/x3bf
  Replies (8) Good night (714) Bad night (1952)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father

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  (302): I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father http://tfl.nu/aa2i
  Replies (8) Good night (961) Bad night (380)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday

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  (516): I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday http://tfl.nu/1b3a
  Replies (1) Good night (386) Bad night (222)

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