Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313) hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work http://tfl.nu/bjlm
  Replies (4) Good night (1886) Bad night (1655)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9. http://tfl.nu/1zb6
  Replies (25) Good night (2132) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Ontario

  He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French. http://tfl.nu/rqrw
  Replies (81) Good night (1087) Bad night (5860)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone. http://tfl.nu/9w3d
  Replies (8) Good night (3813) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground http://tfl.nu/qcj8
  Replies (13) Good night (886) Bad night (2374)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Is it penis luge time yet?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Is it penis luge time yet? http://tfl.nu/x21x
  Replies (8) Good night (1637) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned. http://tfl.nu/5o0t
  Replies (4) Good night (1213) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit http://tfl.nu/a7ne
  Replies (13) Good night (936) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex. http://tfl.nu/smrh
  Replies (13) Good night (1760) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with? http://tfl.nu/hn5g
  Replies (4) Good night (895) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF. http://tfl.nu/3w9f
  Replies (12) Good night (1549) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her. http://tfl.nu/mkbl
  Replies (5) Good night (1002) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde? http://tfl.nu/3wcs
  Replies (5) Good night (440) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!" (615): which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex http://tfl.nu/lioz
  Replies (0) Good night (242) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"

  (407): View more from Florida

  I was feeling the aftermath of his penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa" (407): I was feeling the aftermath of his penis http://tfl.nu/n61i
  Replies (1) Good night (707) Bad night (148)

Randomize