Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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