Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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