New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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