Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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