i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize