Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
