hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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