Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
