apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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