Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
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Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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