shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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