Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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